No More Comparison Parenting

In the world we are living in today, it is so easy for both parents and young adults to get caught up in being fake and adding unnecessary pressure to themselves. It becomes a cycle of performance, comparison, and confusion — a trap many of us fall into without even realising it.

So how do we break free?

For me, it started with accepting that I will not be a perfect parent. I had to ask myself: What do I have? What can I change? How can I improve as a parent? What can I start doing now to strengthen my relationship with my young adults?

Parenting young adults is a different chapter, one that requires more listening, more patience, and more self-reflection. They are no longer children, but they are not fully formed adults either. They are learning, stretching, stumbling, and discovering who they are. And as parents, we are learning right alongside them.

My role is not to shape them into a version of me, but to support them in becoming the best version of themselves.

So I ask myself daily: How can I nurture their uniqueness? How can I inspire them to grow, not just academically or professionally, but emotionally and spiritually too?

Because young adults don’t need perfect parents. They need present parents. They need parents who are willing to grow, to apologise, to adapt, and to see them as individuals with their own gifts and their own path.

Our job is not to compare them to others or compare ourselves to other parents. Our job is to carry our own torch with honesty and let them carry theirs with confidence. When we do that, we create space for real connection, real growth, and real understanding.

Too deep, but necessary. (Maria)